Root Canals Are A Blast: A Dedication To Megan.

Sup dawgs? It is 1:38 and I'm chilling watching 8 Simple Rules. I'm so sick of tv. I have most likely spent 96 hours of the last 120 hours of my life watching tv and feeling sorry for myself. It's been good. Okay so people keep calling me asking how I am. First off, how does everyone know? How many people did my mom tell? And two, like, obviously my mouth hurts. I don't want to talk to you or anyone right now. So stop calling. But seriously did she tell the whole world? Okay. So, let's do a play by play of the root canal shindig. So I got to the place. It was on the third floor. Mom made us take the stairs. *shudder*. So we go in and there is this lil italian lady at the receptionist desk. She was pretty clueless. So apparently we needed all of this paperwork from the dentist, which he never gave us. So there was this whole big ordeal but we finally got it settled. So then the lady called me back and took some X-rays. I had to put this thing in my mouth and bite down. Like, doesn't she know I'm in pain? Specialists should know stuff like that. So the xray came out looking worse than expected. Oh my mom brought me home a milkshake! So where was I? Oh right. So yeah. It apparently was extra bad. The infection thing was the size of a dime. And then the guys all like oh well it could be more than one tooth. And he says it all casually like it's not a big deal. But luckily he said it's not bad yet but it will get bad. There's just a hole chilling in my tooth, ready for infection. So I have to get it filled. And I can't chew on that side of my mouth until it's filled. And I can't get into the dentist til mid July, so I am gonna have a good life. Anywho. So after he told me that, he explained the procedure to me, not that I cared. It made no difference to me how he got rid of the pain, just as long as it did. So then he rubbed this gel on my gums and then said, here comes the worst part. Just a little jolt. Okay no. Not a little "jolt." He killed me with novicane. I almost died. That thing was in my gum for a good five minutes. It hurt. Loads. So then I had to wait for ten minutes for it to completely numb. So the lady gave me this national geographic magazine. Like, no. This isn't the time. Seriously? So then the big man on campus comes back in and lays me down. And I happen to notice there are fake windows on the ceiling. One had a palm tree. Like, when was the last time you saw a palm tree in Ohio? Plus we were on the third floor of a five story building. That's not how life works. Sorry. So I'm laying here with this stupid magazine in my hands, and he puts this lil rubber contraption and pulls my tooth through. It was so weird and tasted like llama fur. And don't forget the sunglasses they gave me. Not exactly sure why. But they just took my glasses off and put some sunglasses on. I was sorta confused. But that's okay I guess. So then they started drilling holes into my teeth. You know, the norm. It was swell. Not to be confused with swollen. Which also was the case. So after a while, you know, I'm in all this pain, etc, and that son of a gun has the nerve to ask me to hold this tool shindig thing in my mouth. Like, what? Are you kidding me? Okay. H8 you too. So after about 45 minutes, all was done. I was escorted back into the waiting room and surprise, scooter was out there with mom. It was pleasant. So we all left like one big happy family. As we're on the stairs, I noted that my bottom teeth still hurt. So scooter, being the kind of scooter he is, made us go back upstairs and made the doctor check my teeth again. I had to get more xrays which hurt more, and nothing was wrong. So. We left again. And I think that basically wraps it up. Except me neighbor just brought me cut up fruit. Yet another person who knows about my misfortunes. Thanks mom. Alright, catch y'all later. Stay fresh.